ILLUSTRATION: Maiko Kisaka
© Maiko Kisaka 2004


booty bass (page 2 of 3)

Wherein lies the problem. Party music it may be, and excellent it is, but as a woman - and how I loathe even having to say that, to think of myself in terms of nipples and clit in relation to music - it's hard not to cringe when Assault reminds you to wash your cunt out.

If one doesn't wish to be a total passive retard, a dollybird hoist on a postmodern podium by her fluffy bra, then at some level any chick digging this shit will have to - at least for a second - examine her reaction to the lyrical content of some of her favourite tracks, and attempt to formulate some kind of justification.


Maybe it's an extreme satire of male objectification of women. In support I present DJ Assault's song 'Yo Relatives', which presents a litany of abuse, set against Assault's trademark crude, rumpshaking beats. 'Yo' momma, yo' daddy, yo' sister's a bitch / yo' auntie, yo' uncle, yo' cousin is gay / yo' niece, yo' nephew, yo' grandparents suck.' This is so retted, so Terence and Phillip, so Beavis and Butthead, that is can only be taking the piss out of… well, everything.

Unfortunately, Assault's own explanation of his attitudes towards the women in his songs does not suggest such a sophisticated use of imagery. 'I don’t disrespect respectful ladies. A lady will know she’s a lady and won’t be offended by what I have to say. She ain’t gonna take that shit from no man. A lady is a lady and a bitch is a bitch.' Thanks for that enlightening reiteration of the old madonna/ whore syndrome, dude!

Unable to take that essential step back from the attitudes peddled in his lyrics, one has to doubt Assault's claims that the 'persona' and beliefs presented in his songs are any different to his own; doubt that he is deploying tired
clichés in order to expose said clichés: conclude instead that the views stated in the songs are his own, assume rather that they perpetuate a worldview that he feels to be right.

We could argue instead that Assault favours a generous sexual approach towards women: that he is proud of his ability to get them off, rather than merely focusing on his own pleasure. It could be claimed that Assault knows where the source of women's pleasure lies: that his songs do not simply break women down into sexual components, but acknowledge their needs in a way unprecedented in his field.

After all, what is the thing that women are always complaining of a lack of? Foreplay. And which are the bits that women like to have stimulated during foreplay? Nipples and clits. And who wrote a song devoted to the glories of those precise body parts? Exactly. Plus, in 'Bustos Brothas' he gives the lady on whom he is pulling a train (with 'Puffy', no less) space to demand that her cunt be licked and her toes sucked 'like beautiful roses' - big of him, even if he doesn't comply.

Unfortunately, this is the 21st century, and the man today who isn't prepared to provide for those needs is the anomaly, not the norm. The day a woman who's prepared to take it in the ass and suck on that dick still needs to beg for a little tongue action is long past, and no man who agrees to provide a little pussy-licking should be hailed as a feminist - just a guy doing his fair share of tha biz.


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it's hard not to cringe when Assault reminds you to wash your cunt out.

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Miss AMP gets overly excited by a big hairy Jewish rapper.

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Le Tigre: They're Grrrrrrrrreat!
No drummer, just a dat, some samples, and three kick-ass muscians /art activists. Yay!

Reviews: Things That Do Not Suck
Magazines beginning with the letter 'C'.

Saf Sees Iggy
Saf checks out an exhibition of Iggy Pop pictures at the Scala club in London

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Suki gets a boner under heavy riffage.

The Runaways

Riffs! Eyeliner! Oestrogen! Joe Pop on the greatest girl-group EVA!

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Whilst tripping off his tits at 3am, Brian Wilson bought a telescope shop, because it pissed him off that there were no telescope shops open at that time of night. Rrriight.

 

 
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